My Great Speech

Sock Therapy

Today I heard about the worst idea in the history of the world, it is called Shock Therapy.  Basically, the idea is to suddenly release price controls, withdrawl of state subsidies, and to create trade liberalization.  To me this sounds as if the creator of this idea is championing inequality in their state.  Through communism and my own brand of communism, called Stalinism, I have been able to create an equal living environment for the people of the great USSR.  What kind of a world is it where one person is regarded as more important because he has more money?  This is the kind of world that Shock Therapy promotes, and I will not tolerate such ideas in our great nation.  I hereby declare that anyone who even thinks the words "Shock Therapy" will be seized by the secret police, thrown into a gulag, and will be completely erased from history, your own mother will not even know you exist.

Foreign Policy

During my time in power, my main foreign policy goal was to keep western values out of the USSR, especially the dangerous idea of capitalism.  I also wanted to spread the ideas of communism, especially my own take of communism, Stalinism, as much as possible.  While leading the USSR, I helped the Allied Powers to defeat the Nazi's and the Axis Powers in World War II.  I maintained good relations with China and Maozedong, because of our similar beliefs.  I also provided North Korean forces with arms to help Kim Il Sung take over the rest of the Korean Peninsula.  Under my leadership, the USSR was also one of the first contries to recognize Israel as a country. In a nutshell, I believe that the USSR should keep the ideas of the capitalist pigs out, and promote communism where we can, and eventually take the world.

Secret Police

On the subject of secret police, I liked to use the NKVD, or the People's Commissariat for Internal Affairs.  During my time in power, the NKVD included the public police force, ran the Gulags, and the Main Directorate for State Security, the predecessor of the the KGB.  The main goal of the NKVD was to suppress an oppostion to the State and myself, Joseph Stalin.  Many of the dissenters caught by the NKVD were sent to the gulags where they belonged, or were executed.  Those who were dealt with by the NKVD were erased from Russian history, in short, they never existed.  The NKVD also used political assassinations to keep the peace in the great USSR.  The NKVD was by far one of my most effective tools in keeping myself in power.